I was abandoned as a small pecan nut and raised by kindly spiders in a bus terminal outside Rathdrum, Idaho. Fleeing from the Cylon tyranny, I was able to adjust to my new surroundings by posing as a mail carrier pretending to be drunk, which I wasn't. I've since learned that it pays to accept money from people.
In the real world, I'm a graphic designer that's fond of whimsy ("Oh, Professor, you're so full of whimsy!" "You can tell from there? Must've been the radishes I had for lunch."), jangly pop music that sets your spirit a-tappin' and your head a-bobbin', and all sorts of terribly geeky things.